My Mind

It started on 11 February 2008. To u ‘8’ guys out there that think u are right all along, tat me & J are together long long time ago, I want to say “U r wrong, dude!”. Terribly, horribly, & significantly wrong! Ppl with matching height & body structures doesn’t necessarily are couples. Before 11 February 2008, we are very good friends only.

Ya we do kiss, so wat? What type of era are u living in? It’s just natural for young new couples. I know where is the limit that we can’t go near, so don’t u worry, or more directly ‘8’ about my stuff. It’s just another chapter of my small life, it‘s none of your business, so stay out of it, ok? Mind your own biz. Don’t talk about other ppl’s biz when u have nothing to talk about. Keep your opinion to yourself. I’m not that kind of person that will embarrass others by telling ppl to shut up face off, but pls realize who r U to do so.

People usually see me as the ‘who who who’ tat got relation wit tat ‘who who who’. Or tat ‘who who who’ de ‘who who who’. Or just simply that ‘tall, slim, flat’ girl. I hate that. Can’t u juz c me as me, as AngeLica Yap, as an individual? I don’t want to live for someone else, I don’t want to be that irrelevant, unimportant side character anymore, I want to be me! I want to live as me! Am I that inferior as a human? Are U ignorant ppl out there more superior than me? Can’t u just recognize me as me? Who give u the power to judge who am i? Who are U to judge me? Don’t simply pass judgements on others. Before u judge others, judge yourself first. See how ppl judge u first. See whether your judgement is needed or not first. See whether you have the power or right to judge others first. G__ d___ u pathetic creatures out there that think U are mightier than God, to criticize His creation…

I do have fun with my current present time but at the same time loses things that are dear to me, & hearing voices that hurt me too… There’s a saying that goes “when U gain something, U loses something too”, how true is it, I wanna know. There’s a saying too that goes “All’s well, ends well”, how true is it, I wanna know too…

To U all b_______ out there, let’s just wait & see how my ‘roller coaster’ ride will end up…

2006 – 2007

SW054/1024

Mathematics T, Chemistry, Physics, Pengajian Am

SMK Jinjang

End le, end of my Form 6 life… Ppl say the end of one chapter means the beginning of a new chapter.

But I feel I’d wasted my 2 years… I did so badly… No A… No B… Juz hope no F… I’m so lazy, so not disciplined, so not concentrated, so not focused… so nothing, in my brain… Even worst than my SPM…

Wat to do??? I’m not the type of person tat will regret on the past… So??? Move on lo… No matter wat the result will b, I’m already prepared 4 it. Bring it on…

But I’ll still b very sad when others got good result… Y? Y I’m so stupid? Y they can but I cant? Aren’t v all homo sapiens? Blame who? Tis is me. Its all mine & my own fault.

But I’ve found things tat r more useful, experiences tat made me stronger, memories tat I treasure, friends tat I love, skills tat I need…

So studying is not my expertise, so wat… I’ll find my own way. Or else, I’ll carve my own… There’s always 2molo after 2day…

Making the best out of the worst, tat’s wisdom…

Wish me luck o…

If my grandfather had followed his 2 younger brother back to China, then I’m now a pure China girl.

I’d went to China on 19 to 24 April 2007, to visit my distant relatives and also in the mean time, holidaying.

Macau, Hong Kong, Mongkok, GuangZhou, ShenZhen, and also KLIA. Hong Kong Disneyland, Meridian View Centre ShenZhen(like KLCC), Splendid China & China Folk Culture Villages ShenZhen, Grand Lisboa Casino Macau(X gamble), Fisher Village Restaurant(almost 6X larger than Restaurant Choi Wah), my relatives’s place, and many more. Further info..? I wont tell u. See my pictures at http://angelica2chin.blogs.friendster.com/photos/china_girl

Mind u, it’s mostly my own picture. Y? Coz I’m usually with the photographer, my sis. Furthermore, I can’t put all the photos as there are almost thousands of them. So I can only choose among the best. Pity pity. For more pic, do request from me, I’m more than willing to share.

I do really enjoy this 8-people trip with 4 of my father’s sister, one with husband, while me and my 2 sisters representing my father. Its quite economic too as I have relatives there (accomodation). Hehe. Plus, my aunt planned the trip earlier, so there’s no time wasted.

Now i can proudly say "I do have relatives at China, which are still keeping in touch & I have visited them before, at CHINA".

Wat? Did i hear u say tat you are jealous???

Dun b coz you’ll have ur chance.

Sore chan, sayonara.

My very 1^st camping experience as the organizing committee. I don’t know whether it’s a happy or unhappy experience but I’m sure it’s a good, new experience for me. There’re lots of obstacles tat me & my friends stumbled upon, but now, it’s a sweet bitter memory to recall.

There’re arguments wit the juniors, and also among friends, even best friends. Flaws everywhere, but who to blame? My inadequate (or none) experience or uncooperative, very uncooperative workmates? Thank God I still can blunder on, despite not much help from fellow organizers except 5, backing me up, I thank you, Chloe, Nick, Json, Eddie, & Louis.

The worst nightmare, the campfire, DISASTROUS!!! Invited 2frens 2 help start the campfire. Thank you. Find woods to burn, send to school using 3 cars, (1 is mine), to & fro a few times, dirtying my car, infecting wit ants & bugs. Took my grandma’s zinc rooftop without permission, to & fro school using hand delivery (though not mine). But alas, the programme failed. Nick lead them run a few laps, Json burn the rest of the woods viciously, Chloe tantrumming, & me? Standing there, wit all of them, one & only senior, facing the fire, burning in heat & heart, yet frozen in the coldest of human nature, witnessing the end of all the efforts contributed by many. Then, there is an uncontrollable gentle silentness yet furious emotional outbreak, how pathetic.

Well, that’s something 2 remember.

But I do have a good times wit them, fellow juniors, at times. I got more close to them (some which I didn’t even know exists). But in the end, I felt a bit of contentment’s happiness knowing tat some of the juniors saw/felt my heart in making tis camp a success. (even though without help from ‘them’).

So exhausted. I myself also dun understand why I would do so much for a board which had given me unlimited suffering, sadness, disappointment, & torture, which surpasses all the happiness it had ever given me. Wat a corrupted board. A supposingly strict board handled by lenient leaders, wat a corrupted organization. The reason y I’m still engulfing myself in tis?, I do not know.

Look at the bright side, its totally a sweet bitter memory now. (“ ,  ” )

The Wedding.

I use ‘the’ so,it is not necessarily mine. Dun feel cheated, coz i didnt. It is a wedding, juz not mine, in reality.

It is me, wearing a green nite wedding gown. Its a make-up demonstration with the theme ‘Nite Wedding Look’ organised by a small group of people. Its my 1st association wit the outside world. It is a good experience. I know the outside world is big, but not tis huge. Wow…

I was introduced by my aunt to tis group of ppl under the business Amway. Frankly, like u & anyone else, It doesnt sound a bit interesting. But i was selected 2 nb the model 4 tis function, things turn into a whole new twist.

Frankly, who doesnt 1 2 b pretty/handsome even 4 a short time???

After tat, i followed their a 3-month beauty course & now, i’m a qualified junior beauty consultant. If u r looking 4 facial treatment @ make-up, do find me. (student priced) Dun hesitate 2 ask, it’ll b totally private & confidential.

Tat’s all 4 now. Actually, i still have 3 more modelling experiance. If u wanna know, do follow my story & add me. U can also introduce me 2 ur frens which is also interested.

Sayonara 4 now.